Placement,Placement everywhere but not a JOB to Take....

This is an insight into my mixed feelings which happen to surface whenever i think about my exams and placements which are like round the corner....anyone whose ever been to a b-grade b-school will agree with me when i say "placement ,placement everywhere but not a job to take"

WHEN TIME STOPPED…

Time….it never remains the same...it changes...Bringing with it newer experiences and interactions.The way you react to these experiences also keeps changing from time to time. There are sometimes you can be highly tolerant and at others you can’t stand it...You can’t stand the excruciating grueling torture that u can escape only after going through it.
When my 22 years come down to the next 20 days I am filled with mixed feelings. I am scared yet confident…I am competitive yet complacent…this I think comes from the fact that I am still dangling between the concept of destiny…..some say u can change it…some say u cant…well I am just a 20 something fence sitter…ask me this question like 10 years down the line and I might be in a better position to answer it…
Suddenly there is a spurt of decision and the worst part (which comes from having attained majority or adulthood) is that I don’t want to take the responsibility of those decisions. Can’t somebody just make them for me?
I am nervous and dejected at times and motivated and confident at others. I am getting to see myself like never before .I have become immune to stress...nothing affects me anymore…it’s like watching myself from a distance…watching myself everyday sitting in class…in canteen…never in the library though…and wasting time at home…
I want to work for it and yet not work…I know I should be preparing but I don’t…I know I should be reading the newspaper but I don’t…I just don’t…who am I fighting…why are there two me’s…one is super efficient and proactive and the other is lazy and complacent. How hard is it to work for yourself. Work hard to ensure that you do yourself some good.
These mixed feelings are noticeable now. They are there and they leave me hollow each time my heart beats.
Life has become a mere obligation. Sometimes I wish I had the same magical potion that made Rip Van Winkle sleep for 20 years.
As I struggle to read the newspaper everyday understanding what the subprime crisis was and how spectacularly China performed and hosted the Olympics I am overwhelmed.
I realize how I am just a miniscule part of this big bad world. I realize I am not the only one suffering and there are others who are screwed in more gargantuan proportions than me. And it’s sadistically comforting to know I am not alone.
As I mug up terms and definitions of different subjects I stop and think for some time and realize that I am surprisingly motivated by the time I end this article as opposed to how dejected I was when I started writing it. And it leaves me with a drive to live through another day .
I don’t want to know what happens the day I start with motivation and end in dejection cause then there won’t be another day .I would be done for good.



well i did end this on a very depressing note....it just sounds all dejected and mature but for the record m not all or any of that....so long.....Pray for me people.....